Visiting Teaching for April

I tend to not share my spiritual things on here, but I felt that maybe I should. I intend on printing my blog, somewhere down the line, and want my children to read about my experiences. Since this past month's visiting teaching message really stuck out to me, I wanted to share it.

I really am trying to be good about VT, especially since I've really enjoyed getting to know my companion and the sisters we visit. Each month my companion, Kari, and I trade off the thought. April was my turn to give the thought, which was on personal revelation. Last Sunday, we went and visited a new sister. I tend to get nervous when it comes to new people, and the message came out all blah!! Then Sunday night happened, and the news of my brother brought on emotions that I had thought were gone. As I spoke with Macki, tears silently pored down my face. She is will always be my friend, my sister, and my hero.

My life has been about so many different choices, and I have had to face many hard trials. I have quickly learned that there is opposition in all things. The two biggest decisions of my life, Macki is now facing. My heart aches, and I wish with all of my being, that she didn't have to go through any of this. However, each trial, I emerged a better, stronger, valiant woman. I, too, know she will make it out on top, with a clearer understanding of the love our Heavenly Father has for each of us. A lot of our questions won't be answered at this time, but I pray that she will begin to know that we are never alone.

Then there is my life with my wonderful husband. He truly is a great man. I wish I had some of the same attributes as him. Some days, I have anything BUT patience for the kids. And where Grant has been having some rough times, I have wanted to give up. A few Fridays ago, Grant had pushed me to the breaking point. I sent a text to Mark at work letting him know that I was done, and I officially was quitting. Grant had broken me that day, but the feelings quickly faded the next day. A week later, I was talking to Mark about me finally being able to quit work, and stay home with the kids. I was a little caught off guard when he told me he wasn't sure I could handle being home with the kids. Who was I to argue? I knew that days before, I had told him I was done. I just walked outside and began to pull weeds in my garden. He came out and I just looked at him and said, "I don't know why I even try with this garden. It's not worth it." He assured me that we would reap the benefits some day. I couldn't help but feel prompted to turn it around. I told him that I knew it was worth the effort, even on days it rained, and with all the weeds. I knew some day I would be able to come out and pick lots of different things for us to enjoy. But the same rang true with our children. I told him that I knew there were going to be bad days with the kids, days when I wouldn't see the enjoyment of it, but that those days are short lived, and that some day we would be able to enjoy the benefit of me being able to stay at home with our children.

Later that night I pulled out my Patriarchal Blessing. It had been some time since I had read it, and Mark had never read it (just haven't had it come up). I sat in bed, crying, as I read that I would have the patience and strength to raise my children, in a way that would be pleasing to myself and the Lord. What a personal revelation!! I called Mark into the room and we read the whole thing. He sat there in silence. My own personal revelation had been heard and felt by my husband. And there was a comfort there... And the next day some thing else happened that hopefully will impact our family hugely, but I'm with holding that information until I know for a fact what is happening =).

This happened all on Tuesday. I was able to go, again, visiting teaching to another sister this past Friday. I had forgotten the ensign and so I let those experiences lead the way. I felt the spirit pour out as I spoke about the importance of staying close to the spirit, and about prayers. How blessed I am to have the gospel in my life. I am grateful that I am married to a wonderful and worthy priesthood holder. Each day I am giving the opportunity to improve my life, as well as the lives around me.